!

There was another turn just like this one about a hundred yards back. It's called 'The W'. I think someone double dared a highway engineer.

-b

K attempts to steer what we initially thought was the Chattanooga Choo-Choo. That was until we found out that this was the world's first all-brick locomotive, the East Tennessee Stationary.

-b

The Great Southeast: Day 8

Chattanooga Fun Facts!

The bridge pictured above does not lead to another state.
When in town, be sure to stop at Clumpies Ice Cream.
Waiters will tell you they were born at the same hospital as you.

-b

Free Beer!

I've seen the commercials. You find yourself a real nice cool mountain stream, reach in, and pull out a six-pack of Busch. Unfortunately, this being real life in Appalachia, all we got were two empty Pabst Blue Ribbon cans and a Mountain Dew cap.

-b

The Great Southeast: Day 7

In yet another case of what we like to call 'traveler's disappointment', we veered off the main road for the temptation of looking at some French broads. There were none.

-b

A ScenicJourney

The Blue Ridge Parkway is perhaps the most beautiful scenic drive in all of America.

-b

A Record Setting Dinner

Yes, the photo is very blurry, but I was caught up in the tremendous excitement. K became the first person in the history of Cracker Barrel Frustration Triangle Golf Tee game to clear the entire board of pegs!

-b

Extreme Adventure Travel

To prove what HARDCORE, EXTREME, ADVENTURE travelers we are, we broke the only rule we made for the trip: no Cracker Barrels.

Before dining, we bungee jumped off the roof.

-b

Watch Out For Turtles!

Thanks for the warning, but the chances of us spotting a sea turtle appear to be approaching zero.

A note: this is the second best 'xing' sign of the trip. The winner goes to 'TANK XING', but I didn't feel like stopping in the middle of Camp Lejeune to snap a photo.

-b

The End

Does the other sign say: "My Other End Is On Tybee Island"? Probably not.

-b

A Valentine Wish For You

There is nothing more illuminating . . .
Like a lighthouse while on vacating . . .
Next to a sunset with great heater . . .
And a charming parking meter

My next career starts in the greeting card industry.

-b

The Great Southeast: Day 6

Has the Chicago-based Polish-American lobbying effort gone too far? Does Savannah need a statue of Casimir Pulaski? Did they need to tear down the statue of city founder Chuck Savannah?

-b

Help Us!

Hey you web surfers! Help us identify this photo. We don't know what it is or where it was taken! You could win a prize!

-b

The Great Southeast: Day 5

What visit to South Carolina would be complete without a visit to a plantation? Okay, so that's a rhetorical question.

Here's a lovely view from the Magnolia Plantation. It's truly amazing what one can accomplish given a vast supply of slave labor.

-b

The Great Southeast: Day 4

You may ask, "What happened to Day 3?" We aren't sure either. But here's a picture of the house in Charleston I'm buying for K.

-b

Loggerhead Sea Turtles: Fact Or Fiction?

No trip to the Atlantic coast would be complete without visiting the legendary loggerhead sea turtle. We learned that near Surf City there was a sea turtle hospital. As is the case with many attractions this time of year, March is considered "out of season".

What this means for the sea turtles is unknown. Perhaps they are fending for themselves.

The good news is that this fine burg has preserved it giant fiberglass shark.

-b

Create-Your-Own-Caption Contest!

So far we've received these entries:

"This was the last photo taken of K before she was apprehended by the authorities."

"Sadly, the locals informed us that the correct pronunciation of the street is kare-EE."

"Iowa Woman Continues Path Of Destruction By Knocking Over North Carolina Street Signs."

-b

4 Reasons Why You Should Always Stay At A 2.5 Star Over A 3 Star Hotel.

1. Not as far to walk from the front desk to your room.

2. At a 2.5 star hotel you can eat as many bagels as you want for free. At a 3 star hotel they're $2.45 each, plus tax.

3. Similarly, at a 2.5 star hotel you get free wireless internet. At a 3 star hotel internet is $9.95 per computer.

4. No need to step over the 'complementary' copy of USA Today on your way out the door.

...

Running Tally:

Waffle House 14
Shoney's 9
Tudor's Biscuit World Whatever # I said last time. This appears to be exclusively a West Virginia Establishment.

...

Second Contender for Official Song of the South: That 'To the Left Song' by Beyonce.

- K.

Media Blackout Or National Apathy?

Once again, a pair of sleepy Iowans hunt down the biggest story of the millennium.

Alien craft! On the main highway of Hatteras Island! Where are the television cameras? Where are Woodstein and Bernward? Hey!

-b

Your Lighthouse Or Mine?

If anyone can explain to me why our government hasn't funded a massive lighthouse-building campaign, I'd like to know. To this very day, ships continue to wreck because of our ill-lighted beaches, shorelines, riverfronts, and lakes. When is enough enough? Will your pleasurecraft, oil tanker, or schooner be next?

Here, the Cape Hatteras lighthouse is flanked by a lovely full moon. To be perfectly honest, it looks much larger on television.

-b

First In Flight?

Is there more to the story of Wilbur and Orville Wright? We drove under Wilbur Wright Boulevard in Indiana. Ohio claims them as their sons. North Carolina celebrates them on the license plate. What is the truth? And did they really land on the moon?

Here a lone seagull pays homage to the Brothers Wright without whom he would be flightless.

-b

The Great Southeast: Day 2

Don't you hate it when your favorite rock bands sell out? And they think we wouldn't notice. -b

5 Ways In Which The Universe Is Conspiring To Ruin Our Great Southeastern Vacation

1. K's phone at work rings at 4:32 after she has just shut down her computer. "Could you please do this one thing? He'd really appreciate it if you could get it to him this afternoon."

2. On Wednesday morning, B heads out to his car to find two smallish cracks on the lower right hand side of his windshield. On Thursday afternoon we find that the cracks are no longer smallish.

3. Wednesday night;, hailstorms. Thursday, rain. All day. Rain.

4. On the day B & K are to leave for vacation, K finds a mysterious envelope from the City of Bettendorf in her mailbox. This envelope contains a subpoena to appear at 9:30 AM on Tuesday, 6 March.

5. B is pretty sure he has dislocated his thumb.

...

Also. Running Tally

Waffle House - 8
Shoney's - 7
Tudor's Biscuit World (new to me) - 7

...

Also also. The official song of the south is actually something by Nelly Furtado. And you thought it was something else.

- K.

Great Moments In West Virginia Architecture

It was a difficult choice, but we managed to sort through a wealth of leaning mobile homes, coal chutes, and Tudor's Biscuit World brick buildings before settling on the New River Gorge bridge as the #1 architectural site on today's journey.

It has been estimated that this bridge weighs over 100 pounds!

-b

The Great Southeast: Day 1.0

Here we are at the Charleston Moose Lodge. We bought a round of drinks for the men, and toasted 'Viva South Carolina!' Imagine our surprise when one of the grumps told us we were in Charleston, West Virginia. Oops. I blame K's navigational skills. Except that she was driving.

Viva West Virgina! Viva!

-b