Here's a secretly snapped photograph of the Minneapolis airport men's room that's been in the news lately. The action seems to have died down quite a bit, but the stalls do contain a large amount of slightly more engaging graffiti than may be expected:
'HI I'M LARRY CRAIG!' 'what a hipcryte' 'these libs and their double standards'
Not one of the scrawls began with 'There once was a man from Boise' . . .
Monday, September 17, 2007
Moose V. Chevrolet
We did manage to spot a moose during daylight. This medium-sized bullmoose sauntered from the watery gulch, on to Route 100, and back, again and again. Combine moose unpredictability, near-accident flashbacks, and 16 hours of drenching rain and you get a Chevy HHR in the ditch.
No damage done to us or the vehicle, and thanks to incredibly helpful and chatty Vermonters, we were on our way again in 90 minutes. For the record, the least helpful drivers are those with tiny, British sports cars who seem hell-bent on crashing their tiny, British sports cars on curving mountain roads into large, American moose.
No damage done to us or the vehicle, and thanks to incredibly helpful and chatty Vermonters, we were on our way again in 90 minutes. For the record, the least helpful drivers are those with tiny, British sports cars who seem hell-bent on crashing their tiny, British sports cars on curving mountain roads into large, American moose.
subjects:
accidents,
automobiles,
car accidents,
moose,
mud,
Vermont
Ice Cream, Ice Cream, We All Leave I-89 At Exit 10 For Ice Cream
The Ben & Jerry's factory tour in Waterbury Center, Vermont is kind of worth the price of admission. You do get to sample some, in our case, Creme Brulee ice cream, but don't bother visiting on Saturday if you're interested in seeing the product manufactured. The highlight of the stop is the Flavor Graveyard where the poorly received and poorly conceived ice creams of yore are buried and eulogized with snappy and clever epitaphs.
But is there more to the story? We found only about 20 headstones. Where are the rest of the flavors buried? In unmarked graves in highway ditches? In the cow pasture? In a file cabinet drawer at Unilever headquarters? The same corporation that owns SlimFast?!?
But is there more to the story? We found only about 20 headstones. Where are the rest of the flavors buried? In unmarked graves in highway ditches? In the cow pasture? In a file cabinet drawer at Unilever headquarters? The same corporation that owns SlimFast?!?
subjects:
burial rites,
conspiracies,
corporations,
ice cream,
Vermont
Don't Squish The Father Of Our Country
The Fairbanks Museum in lovely St. Johnsbury contains some fine examples of, um, natural history and lots and lots of dead birds, but what I'll remember is this tribute to General and President George Washington made entirely of dead butterflies and beetles.
subjects:
beetles,
buttterflies,
George Washington,
insects,
portraiture,
the 'eww' factor,
Vermont
Check Your New Hampshire State Quarters
The original Old Man Of The Mountain may be lost forever, but the sprit lives on in the form of the Old Man Of The Climbing Rock.
subjects:
climbing,
facsimile,
New Hampshire,
rocks
Large Stones
In the White Mountains of New Hampshire, we took the scenic route, and rather than gawking out the windows, we dodged out-of-shape runners and their support vans and a never-ending stream of tiny, British sports cars. To get a break from driving, we paused at a campground and found this fine bit of scenery. Big Rock. A rock that is big.
subjects:
automobiles,
big rocks,
New Hampshire,
racing,
rocks,
running,
scenery,
traffic
Who Is King Of The Mountain?
For a brief few seconds, B was the highest person in New England. Here he stands triumphant on top of Mt. Washington.
subjects:
apexes,
mountains,
New Hampshire,
triumph
Scenic Vista Or Tourist Trap?
We visited the location of the world's worst weather -- New Hampshire's Mt. Washington. The weather wasn't all that bad with an air temp of around 40 degrees and winds clocking in the 30-40 mph range. The view from the top of Mt. Washington was truly spectacular. You could literally see your hand in front of your face.
subjects:
clouds,
mountains,
New Hampshire,
vistas
Friday, September 14, 2007
Encounters With Nature
Paul Bunyan: Where Exactly Is He From?
We missed the Paul Bunyan statue in Bangor, but this guy on the other end of the state caught our eye. He looks a lot like some other Bunyans in Wisconsin and Minnesota. Hmmm...
subjects:
Maine,
Minnesota,
Paul Bunyan,
sculpture,
Wisconsin
Mooses, Moosi, Meese, and More Moose
The state animal of Maine is the moose. Therefore, you might expect to see them wandering around everywhere. They aren't. 'Moose Crossing' indicates that a moose may or may not have passed this way at some point. Moosehead Lake has no moose.
We drove several hours out of our way on 'The Moose Highway' through 'Moose Alley'. None there either. Past the Moose Car Wash, Moose Bar & Grill, Mr. Moose's Kampground, and on and on. We did find this fiberglas flying moose.
And, then, on our way to Gorham, New Hampsh*****LOOK OUT!!!****OH MY GOSH THAT IS HUGE!!!***** Yes, a moose. Running across the highway. After dark. Not really the way we wanted to encounter the largest land mammal in North America.
We drove several hours out of our way on 'The Moose Highway' through 'Moose Alley'. None there either. Past the Moose Car Wash, Moose Bar & Grill, Mr. Moose's Kampground, and on and on. We did find this fiberglas flying moose.
And, then, on our way to Gorham, New Hampsh*****LOOK OUT!!!****OH MY GOSH THAT IS HUGE!!!***** Yes, a moose. Running across the highway. After dark. Not really the way we wanted to encounter the largest land mammal in North America.
subjects:
automobiles,
disappointment,
Maine,
moose,
New Hampshire
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Live Free, Die, Or Call A Talk Radio Show
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Twenty To Twenty-Five For Armed Robbery
Yep, that's Neptune and a mermaid hottie cruising on a chopper. This was created entirely of wood entirely by a prisoner entirely in the Maine State Prison. It's not for sale, but you could buy any manner of woodcraft made by inmates at the Maine State Prison Gift Shop. From our observation, lacquer appears to be in abundance in the pen.
Mr. Geology Visits The Rocky Coast Of Maine
Hi, Mr. Geology. Thanks for visiting us in Maine.
You're welcome. I am pleased to be here.
Mr. Geology, can you explain how the coast of Maine came to be?
Of course. Red hot magma from the earth's subcore rises to the surface and is quickly cooled by the crashing seawater forming the red granite, or 'rock', coastline. This process, in geologic terms, is known as igneocoastification.
Mr. Geology, what is the difference between granite and, say, concrete?
Ah, yes. The primary difference is that granite is primarily produced by the defossilization of key stonifying elements such as carbon (periodic table C), adhesive (Ad), and dirt (Dt) while concrete contains a higher level of moon rocks. Don't forget, no question is too stupid for Mr. Geology.
You're welcome. I am pleased to be here.
Mr. Geology, can you explain how the coast of Maine came to be?
Of course. Red hot magma from the earth's subcore rises to the surface and is quickly cooled by the crashing seawater forming the red granite, or 'rock', coastline. This process, in geologic terms, is known as igneocoastification.
Mr. Geology, what is the difference between granite and, say, concrete?
Ah, yes. The primary difference is that granite is primarily produced by the defossilization of key stonifying elements such as carbon (periodic table C), adhesive (Ad), and dirt (Dt) while concrete contains a higher level of moon rocks. Don't forget, no question is too stupid for Mr. Geology.
subjects:
geology,
Maine,
rocks,
verisimilitude
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
As The World Turns
Frank Lloyd Wright
We caught the end of Ken Burns' documentary about Frank Lloyd Wright the other night and were inspired to visit some of his lesser known forays into restuarants.
subjects:
architecture,
Frank Lloyd Wright,
restaurants
America Runs On Sugar, Lard, And Caffeine
We made the obligatory Dunkin' Donuts stop at approximately the 142nd outlet we spotted on our journey. The best thing I can say about the hot chocolate and doughnut is that I could have bought it on the other side of the street or a half block down the street and it would have been exactly the same.
The Shot Heard 'Round The Neighborhood
Quiz Time!
The people in the above photograph are:
(A.) part of my family reunion at Fenway
(B.) prize winners of 99BayFM's 'GET LOCO WITH COCO!!!' contest
(C.) the cast of the new CW sitcom, 'Left of Center'.
(A.) part of my family reunion at Fenway
(B.) prize winners of 99BayFM's 'GET LOCO WITH COCO!!!' contest
(C.) the cast of the new CW sitcom, 'Left of Center'.
subjects:
baseball,
Boston,
family reunions,
quizzes,
radio,
television
Red Sox Hall Of Shame
I am by no measure knowledgeable about the American League, but I can tell you that Tyler Webster never played for the Red Sox. He was one of many Boston fans who show their respect and love for the hallowed tradition of 'The Green Monstah' by writing tributes to their beloved Crimson Hosed baseballers.
As for the game, the Sox lost 1-0 to the Devils Rays behind a sterling effort from pitcher Scott Kazmir -- who, according to the guy standing next to me, throws 'wicked hard' causing the batters to swing 'wicked late'.
As for the game, the Sox lost 1-0 to the Devils Rays behind a sterling effort from pitcher Scott Kazmir -- who, according to the guy standing next to me, throws 'wicked hard' causing the batters to swing 'wicked late'.
Sox Tix? We Got Plenty
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Where's The Fiat?
We asked to meet the Super Mario Brothers but were quickly asked to leave. "Il permesso ora o noi getteranno le polpette voi! Rapidamente! Rapidamente!"
subjects:
Italian,
Italy,
Providence,
Rhode Island
You Can Take Newport Out Of Newport, But You Can't Take Newport Out Of Newport
Mmmm . . . Nothing like taking a long, sweet draw of Newport cigarettes on the streets of Newport. But, we couldn't find the tobacco plantation.
subjects:
agriculture,
cigarettes,
Newport,
Rhode Island
How Much Does Rhode Island Weigh?
We picked it up, and, indeed, it does not weigh eight pounds. More like seven or seven and one-half.
subjects:
anthropomorphism,
Rhode Island,
weight
Rejuvenation At Discount Prices
Gambling With Beef
Flying Down The Mountain
The Boulder Dash roller coaster is the tallest and fastest built on the side of a mountain. Lake Compounce is America's oldest amusement park. I was not the tallest man in Connecticut at the time of this photo.
subjects:
amusement parks,
roller coasters,
world records
Dan Patrick Ate Here . . . Maybe
Saturday, September 8, 2007
Soda Pop Overload
This cornucopia of carbonation is brought to you by Avery's Soda in New Britain, Connecticut. From the outside, it looks like an auto repair garage. And from the inside, it also looks like an auto repair garage. We're not sure what the difference is between Orange Cream and Orange Dry soda. I'll find out in a week or so when TWO CASES of sugary goodness arrive on my doorstep.
Somehow, this contraption produces a fluid that you can consume.
Somehow, this contraption produces a fluid that you can consume.
New England = Nouveau Cuisine
Okay, so we're not in New England yet. This is Detroit City. And this is an all peanut butter sandwich food kiosk. I have little to say but we did miss our connecting flight because I insisted on eating two meals here.
subjects:
airports,
Detroit,
peanut butter
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